Baseball

I don’t know much about sports.

Actually, I don’t know a lot about sports.

 I’m a Yankees’ fan. I’m from New York – shouldn’t I be a Yankees’ fan? I know where they play. I know the colors of their uniforms. Heck, I even know some of the players’ names. If they’re playing a game, and there’s nothing else on TV, I’ll watch the game.  

Okay, so maybe I’m not a “real” fan, but I know a little about the sport. I know there are bases, pitchers, hitters, and catchers. I get the premise of the game – throw a ball, hit a ball, run fast, try not to get out, repeat.  I know they have “hand signals” to tell each other what to do.  

I know that the hitter has a plan. He expects the pitcher to throw him the ball, he’ll hit it, and then he’ll run to first. The other guys on the bases and in the outfield are operating under the same assumption. They know how this will go – who is going to catch it, who will throw it, who it’s safe to get out, who they should let run, and what to expect when it’s hit out of the park.

But sometimes, there’s a curveball. 

The team had a plan, but then the pitcher threw the curveball. Then in seconds’ time, the plan must be rethought, revised, and executed. 

And that’s life.

We have a plan for our lives. We know how it’s supposed to look.  We know what each day should look like. We know where we’ll go to school, what career we’ll have, where we’ll live, who we’ll marry, how many kids we’ll have, what kind of car we drive, and where we’ll take vacations. 

We’re the hitter.

But God’s the pitcher.

And sometimes, he throws us curveballs, just to remind us that we’re not in control of the game. 

I knew where I wanted to go to college, so I became a UCF Knight. I knew who I wanted to marry, so when Nathan asked, I said yes. I knew I wanted to be a teacher, and I now have the keys to my classroom, room 113. I knew I never wanted to leave Sarasota, so we bought a house here. I knew I wanted two children, so…

God threw us a curveball. Despite best efforts to prevent another pregnancy, to keep our family an even-numbered four people, God had other plans. Baby Loomis number three is due in June. 

Talk about a game-changer. Bottom of the ninth, two outs, two strikes, bases loaded. I’m at bat, knowing just what I want to do. Suddenly, the coach comes in and changes the whole game. I only wanted two children; it’s all I ever imagined. But that was my decision. I never asked God what His will was. I was just coaching the game myself.

We found out about the pregnancy during the middle of October 2011. There weren’t words to express the shock that we felt. I had never had more emotions in a week’s time than I did then. Anger. Frustration. Sadness. Anxiety. Fear. Guilt. I cried for a week.  I even called in “sick” to work that week. The questions trampled my head as I rolled over at night. How did we let this happen? How would we raise three children? What were people going to think? Can we afford a third? How will my body handle another pregnancy? How will Aaron feel? What about Ben – he’ll still be so young. Will I possibly have enough love in my heart for another baby?

After collecting myself, I did as I imagined a baseball player would do when they have been thrown a curveball. I took a deep breath and realized the game was not in my hands.  I know I’m not alone. I have a whole team on the field, ready to help. And when we get weary, there’s more in the dugout. And I have friends in the stands, cheering me on, no matter how badly I play this game called life.

It’s been an emotional ride so far. As the days go by, the negative emotions fade and the positive ones rise. I have begun to realize that this baby was in God’s plans all along. This isn’t news to him. Jeremiah I:5 says, “For I knew you before I knit you in your mother’s womb. I have holy plans for you.” 

Logistics. We’ll need a new car. Ours physically can’t fit three car seats (gasp) in the back seat.  We’ll need to redesign the guest room as a new baby’s room. And somewhere down the line, we’ll need a new kitchen table, since the current one only seats four people. But Thanksgiving dinners will be that much richer, Christmas photo cards will feature three smiling faces rather than two, and we’ll have to hide more Easter eggs come spring time. 

God saw me as a mom of three. I guess I need to start seeing myself that way, too.

So, here I am at bat. I was expecting a fast ball. But God threw a curve. I’m going to swing, hit the ball, and start running. It doesn’t matter what happens at each base along the way - as long as I land at home.